Setting Boundaries Part IV: Reducing FOMO
Setting Boundaries with Misophonia Part IV: Reducing FOMO
When you turn down a social event, you miss out on the opportunity—that much makes sense. You may decide against going to a party to take a shower and read a book you’ve been looking forward to only to find photos of said event all over your Facebook feed the next day—and look at all the fun those people were having while you moped around the house (even though you were doing something you enjoyed)! And on the same night, another friend of yours was sailing in Florida, another just finished writing a book, and your mom is frustrated that you haven’t called her enough.
So what can you do to stop diminishing the value of your self-care time?
Ignorance is bliss
The most beneficial action I took was the most drastic: deleting my social medias. But in 2022, removing yourself from the online social sphere isn’t an option for everyone, and it has plenty of drawbacks. That being said, a little ignorance can go a long way when comparing your evening to your friends; it’s harder to guilt-trip yourself over missing an event when you had no way of knowing it was going on in the first place.
If you can’t make the move to delete your social media entirely, try reducing your screen time—out of sight, out of mind.
Determining what you’re envious of
FOMO [“Fear of Missing Out”] can be a sign that there’s an ambition in your life you’ve been putting off in your struggle to balance too much. For example, if your friend’s trip to Florida upsets you, maybe you’re craving travel of your own. If you’re jealous of another buddy’s finished manuscript, maybe you want to add to your own writing portfolio. Or maybe you should catch up with your mom for a bit, even if just for a few minutes.
The challenge is in choosing one goal to focus on. Realize that none of these people are achieving all of your desires at once. So pick one aspect that you’re missing out on, set aside as much time as you can each week until it is done, and then you can move on to the next one—rather than wishing you could do everything at once.
Remind yourself of the purpose of self-care
Unfortunately for employers, productivity is more than a simple in/out equation; break time, despite its appearance of pointlessness, actually improves the amount of work that people are able to do. In other words, you’re not wasting time by reserving a few hours to rest—you’re making yourself more effective at whatever priorities you do decide to make room for in your day. You’re preventing burnout from taking you totally out of commission for a while. So those hours spent supposedly missing out on something? They were actually enabling you to achieve more.
No matter what other people are doing, no matter what you wish you could make room in your life for, remember: you are, and always have been, enough.
So stand up for your needs: you deserve boundaries.